Tatu rolling into Beltchecker like.... https://youtu.be/UjCdB5p2v0Y

The skies over Lapland were seen by Tatu. So do those exist (or not)? https://www.instagram.com[...]8csykohw7z

So, if you want to back a drinker, in a drinking contest with a Pole, don't call a Viking, call a Russian, or a Korean, or another Pole.

Tatu had been Louhi's prisoner for longer than he could remember. He was not particularly a good servant, because Tatu loved beer, and to smoke, and wrestle, and other than chopping firework, he was lazy for regular work. And sometimes Louhi would grow frustrated at him, and would scoop him up, and consume him. But Louhi was wise, and understood the secret of Tatu. She was always careful to leave just enough of Tatu that when she threw his remains in her magic Sampo, on the next full moon, a new Tatu would spring forth, fully formed, looking for beer. One time, after Tatu had sprang forth from the Sampo, he noticed something he had never noticed before. As the moons changed their phases, Louhi seemed to change. On the nights of the Full Moon, she was beautiful, even though she was ancient, and as the moon grew less, and less, Louhi became more and more diseased looking, cross, and her eyesight grew worse and worse, until on the night when there was no moon, Louhi's eye's were milky white, and she was completely blind. On those nights, Louhi's body was twisted in pain, and her fingernails were long like claws, and her sense of smell was better than a wolf's, and she could hear the slightest noise. This, thought Tatu, was his chance. So, Tatu waited until the new moon, when the Louhi became cross, and twisted, blind, and her sense of smell was sharper than any deer or wolf. And that day Tatu prepared a special pea soup, and poured in liberal amounts of the magic yellow mineral from the mines of Eno. This was a recipe he had found from Louhi's own potions book, and it was guaranteed to give anyone that drank it the powers of the winds. After Tatu drank the potion he only needed to wait for the new moon. As Louhi's eyes turned milky white, Tatu's new powers manifested themselves, and he released the winds from his bowels. To his horror, Louhi, looking diseased, in her new form was not horrified. Her huge nose eagerly smelled the winds coming from his bottom. As she snatched Tatu up, she said, 'you will do nicely Lover, first to service my body, and then to fill my belly.' And she ravaged poor Tatu, who could only release more winds in terror, as Louhi had her way with his body. When she finished her carnal pleasures, she ripped his limbs off, and made a blood sausage from poor Tatu. As always, she was careful to save just enough of him, to put in her magic Sampo. And nine months later, with a big belly, Louhi gave birth to a daughter, whom she named Rutto. And Rutto in turn had many children, laying with men, animals, and other foul things to create them. One in particular, was sired when Rutto straddled a bat. And time will tell what horrors that grandchild of poor Tatu and Louhi will cause upon the world. But that, is another story...

Indian sages recount another appearance of Tatu in the Sri Bagavatam. When Lord Krshna and Balarama were set to wrestle the evil goons of the dark lord Kamsa to the death, there, to the surpise of all, a Wind from the North carried forth the stench of Tatu's intentinal movement, rendering Kamsa's goons momentarily helpless in disgust. Lord Krishna & Balarama quickly armdragged the confused goons straight to the standing sleeper hold, strangling them into their next life. Thus, spawning the birth of the proud Indian tradition of Kushti wrestling. Look into it.

By the way, tatu means armadillo (the animal) in Portuguese.

Just found this chart online.. please note that believing in this theory is DANGEROUS TO YOURSELF AND OTHERS

Hey Tatu! Post those camp photos on here! Prove your existence!!

Some say they're photoshopped and that Finland is not supposed to look like this... BJJ Globetrotters Caribbean Island Camp last week. If you have the means to go, go! Such a fantastic experience, especially in the way that it was pulled off during these difficult times. P.S. This was a jiu-jitsu sports camp, as can be seen from the pictures :D

Going to have to book you for a seminar on how to drink beer in the Caribbean.

If you have the means to go, go!