There's one guy who comes to our classes sporadically who I find damn annoying. He's a white belt but thinks he knows everything. Well do pass sweep Positional Sparring and after I sweep him, he keeps going like nothing happened and after I tell him that he was swept and lost the round, hell argue that it doesn't count as a sweep because he voluntarily went to the ground. I'll teach a technique and he'll do everything except what I showed. I'll show him what's wrong with what he's doing and he'll talk about how he is able to do this against black belts. Blah, blah, blah.

In all honesty, I just ignore him. If someone doesn't want to be taught, I don't want to teach them. Fortunately, he doesn't come often enough to be a big issue.

That looks like You got an askhole there…

People that turn up sporadically are a pain in general. They can't do anything and hold up the rest of the class from doing anything advanced. I want our club to ditch 'pay as you go' options for this reason. I used to think mandatory memberships were unfair but I've realised sporadic people almost never convert and don't really add anything either.

If they disrupt the class with their actions, then I'm stepping in and making sure they don't waste anybody's time. In my years of jiu-jitsu I've only needed to do that with 3 people.

Sounds like a candidate I would throw out of the team…. At least I would advice him not to come back, if he doesn’t fix his behavior on the mat….

Well there are these are the classics:

Spazzy people
Poor hygiene people
Too much ego people
Loud heavily opinionated people
Extremely needy people

However, after a while all these example traits can be corrected or at least reduced. For the most part it just takes communication and some time for people to change. People I don't like are the ones who don't change their ways despite receiving several "talks" about how they are making everyone around them uncomfortable for one reason or another.

When I was coaching, there was one I couldn't stand. He would refuse to listen to basic instructions, but then (as a 1 stripe white belt) would try to teach others the "correct" way of doing things. This included sprawling while you're in someone else's guard, not playing any form of stand up passing since "BJJ is a ground sport" and so on. I tried talking to him about it but he blew me off. So I made a point in the next class he was in to show everyone why his ideas were horrible - that sprawling in someone's guard is giving them a free triangle, cross-collar etc.

But where he really got to me and the other instructors was he would only ever roll with people much smaller than him, including the few teenagers we had in class. He would get to a dominant position and act all smug. He ended up hurting a couple of them - from then on, I told him he had to only roll with people I picked for him. He didn't want to listen, and I said well it's that or leave. He still kept trying to sneak in rolls with people much smaller - I caught him about to start rolling with someone much smaller and I told him to go roll with one of the bigger guys. He said "oh no, I'll just sit this one out; I'm too tired". I tried getting the owner of the gym to kick him out, but he refused to.

I had a word with a few of the higher belts at that point and said it's green light to go competition mode with him. Every roll could be the hardest roll of his life. He stopped turning up.

Another problem student I had was a larger female student who basically had the same problem. She would go really rough with people much smaller than her, but someone her size or larger and she would complain they were going too rough with her. The funniest thing was we had a tiny purple belt come visit and I got the purple belt to roll with her - the problem student was stuck in bottom mount but was cheering since she hadn't been subbed yet, but quickly soured when I pointed out that she was in a losing position and that's nothing to cheer about.

There were other instances of people going a bit rough or being a bit of a pain. My general thing is to talk to them about it just to make sure they know that what they're doing is not OK. Most times I've done this, the person has apologised and became a lot better. When they refuse, then I try to take steps to keep newer students out of harm's way. If I owned the gym, I'd probably just have terminated their contract if they refused to listen to me.

No, if course not. I love everyone.

I’m sure most coaches have students they can’t stand. Personalities sometimes clash but there are ways around this dilemma. Having a diverse coaching staff and strong leadership does a tremendous amount to solve most of these personality differences. Communication with problem students falls on the gym ownership to handle and should be done so in a respectful manner. It’s always up to the individual to change but not being part of the gym community anymore may be a consequence of not changing.

Personally there is one type of student we should all watch out for: the dangerous one. They come in all shapes a sizes but it’s never their fault.

I've only been a coach for a little over a year, and I've been fortunate that there hasn't been anyone in the classes I teach who I don't like. However, if a student was being a problem/inconvenience to other students' ability to learn, then it's time for them to leave. I've seen the owner of the gym tell people to not come back for exactly this reason. It's also important to nip things in the butt early, I've learned. There is a student that attends my classes who likes to talk a lot during drilling and waste a lot of precious time for himself and his training partner(s). One day, I just made a playful comment about how he talks too much, and now he stays fairly quiet during the drilling portion of the class and reserves his banter for in between rounds.

My response was going to be very similar to this. There are personalities I'm not particularly fond of but one of my favorite things about jiu-jitsu is that it's a melting pot of so many cultures, careers, personalities, backgrounds, body types, etc. So I try to keep my reservations to myself and treat everyone at the academy like extended family.

If someone's actions gets to the point that they are disruptive or distracting that's when I'll address it. Otherwise I think "to each their own." Hygiene issues falls into the category of disrupting or distracting if it's severe enough. I've kicked people off the mat with ringworm or corrected them for leaving the mats barefoot only to re-enter. That has become increasingly rare. I think it's also important to impart on students that they can elect to NOT roll/train with whoever they want - just be polite about it.

I've only been a coach for a little over a year, and I've been fortunate that there hasn't been anyone in the classes I teach who I don't like. However, if a student was being a problem/inconvenience to other students' ability to learn, then it's time for them to leave. I've seen the owner of the gym tell people to not come back for exactly this reason. It's also important to nip things in the butt early, I've learned. There is a student that attends my classes who likes to talk a lot during drilling and waste a lot of precious time for himself and his training partner(s). One day, I just made a playful comment about how he talks too much, and now he stays fairly quiet during the drilling portion of the class and reserves his banter for in between rounds.

Happily I currently like most of my students, and I get along well even with those whom I dislike. To me that is a point of maturity and tolerance. In the past, I've certainly had troublesome students, but I've found that most disruptive behaviors can be corrected with a bit of light hearted chiding. Dangerous behavior needs a stern warning. But these are not the things which necessarily cause me to dislike a student. Sometimes it's really a personality clash, and in those cases, I've found the student will generally go to other instructor's classes after a few sessions. Fortunately we have wide options at our school. I do have problems with well meaning but clumsy beginners who are grossly overweight. Generally they can not fall safely and they can accidentally injure their partners too easily, so I limit their activity. Most of them get the message and leave for other disciplines which are safer for potential opponents. I also have a serious issue with guys who refuse to work with women, either due to religious proscriptions or because of some misguided sense of masculinity. This issue has come up twice in my very long career. The first time it was a wannabe state trooper, and I simply kicked him out of the class (with full support from the dean of the college). The second time was a devout muslim, and I explained to him that his only option was to take private lessons (which he did for a while, but with a different instructor.)

My time on the mat is my „happy place“.
As a part time instructor with a often stressful job I really can cherry pic who I let into our team!

Of course each person is an individual with different views and perspectives on life, etc…,
But, if I would see someone is just an asshole after some time on the mat and poisons the positive training environment , I simply would kick this guy/girl out…. I have no time or energy for this kind of people.
I would give him/her one chance to change….otherwise: adios!

So I have the luxury I only have good people training with me and who I like and I want to have a positive environment and energy on my mats! Period!

I don’t need everybody and lots of people on the mat!