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My student promoted by someone else.

5 year(s) ago • 7372 views • 32 replies

Eirik Gulbrandsen
Eirik Gulbrandsen
Black belt 2nd degreeVerified9 forum posts1920/1000
5 year(s) ago
One of my students came back from a holiday with 2 new stripes on his white belt, I asked him where he got them, and he told me a friend and brown belt from his home town had given them to him.

Not cool.

After we'd talked, he offered to take them of, but since he was moving back to his home town in a couple of months I didn't make a big deal about it.

This happened about 3 years ago, and it was only 2 stripes on a white belt, but it made me think, has this happened before?

What would your reaction be if some random instructor promoted one of your students?

Have anyone else experienced something like this?
R. David Gonzalez
R. David Gonzalez
Black belt 4th degreeVerified4764 forum posts34325/1000
5 year(s) ago
One of my students came back from a holiday with 2 new stripes on his white belt, I asked him where he got them, and he told me a friend and brown belt from his home town had given them to him. Not cool. After we'd talked, he offered to take them of, but since he was moving back to his home town in a couple of months I didn't make a big deal about it. This happened about 3 years ago, and it was only 2 stripes on a white belt, but it made me think, has this happened before? What would your reaction be if some random instructor promoted one of your students? Have anyone else experienced something like this?
Yes it has happened to me before...
Here is one example:
I had a white belt student that went overseas to teach English. He came back wearing a blue belt.

In his defense, he messaged me about it when the situation came up and asked me whether or not he should accept the promotion.

I told him that it was ok with me if he wanted to accept the belt. There were social media posts about it from the guy who promoted him so I know it was legit.

He came back from his time abroad wearing the blue belt. He was not at the level in my opinion but I did not make him take it off. He earned it fair and square from another black belt.
Never bothered me and we are still very good friends although he moved on to another club eventually just before Covid hit.

In all fairness we knew he'd be gone for a year. Of course if it were my choice people would not do these things, instructors included, but in the end I am not in the controlling people business. I am in the sharing what I know and helping people grow business (even if I do it free).

Soon enough these guys will figure out the error of their ways or they will have moved on when they feel or I feel that I have no more to offer them.

Long story short, don't let these things bother you too much. It is more a mark of the character of the student and not a reflection of you. As you know we live in a time of entitlement. There are no boundaries some people will not cross.
In the end that person has to wear it and usually that is sorted out on the mat with the other perhaps more deserving students.
Tillman Keadle
Tillman Keadle
Black belt 1st degreeVerified9 forum posts1725/1000
5 year(s) ago
My gym is in a college and military town. I've had this happen a few times. Mostly at the beginner levels, so it's hard to be upset at the student because they have no idea. Also had a student come as a purple and tell me he wanted to compete and get promoted by his home gym. Good of him to say upfront and I respect that, but I could feel a little put off.
Also had a very good white that was from our town but went to school upstate and would could come to our gym for a summer. This student should have been a blue a long time ago. They were/are a very good student. Other belts came to me asking me to promote them before they went back to school. I had a conversation with the student and let them know that I thought they were awesome but since they were a guest and we were not the home gym it wouldn't be right for me to promote them. They seemed to understand but could tell they were disappointed. They got promoted right when they went back to their home gym and everything worked out.

If someone is training at multiple gyms I think it's important to have a conversation with the student and inform them they should only be promoted at what they consider their home gym.
Daniël Bertina
Daniël Bertina
Black belt 3rd degreeVerified880 forum posts15560/1000
5 year(s) ago
Random dude promoting my student for shits & giggles?

Well, that's weird.

Dude promoting my student who's intending to relocate and start training with dude?

Sure, godspeed.

Stripes on white belts?

Who cares.
Ken Leif
Ken Leif
Black beltVerified111 forum posts7250/1000
5 year(s) ago
With promotions being so subjective this is an interesting situation, I agree though that it really is on the student to wear the rank. I'm not sure how I'd react to a student of mine coming back with a new belt if they were just on a random trip. I could also see if they were lets say a 4 stripe blue for years and they wanted to visit a home town gym to get promoted for some personal reason I would be fine with that. I think the important part for me would be open communication about it.
Karl Krebs
Karl Krebs
Brown beltPending40 forum posts0/700
5 year(s) ago
One of my students came back from a holiday with 2 new stripes on his white belt, I asked him where he got them, and he told me a friend and brown belt from his home town had given them to him. Not cool. After we'd talked, he offered to take them of, but since he was moving back to his home town in a couple of months I didn't make a big deal about it. This happened about 3 years ago, and it was only 2 stripes on a white belt, but it made me think, has this happened before? What would your reaction be if some random instructor promoted one of your students? Have anyone else experienced something like this?
I almost wonder if there was a miscommunication or lack of communication completely. Brown belt thinks that student is staying around or moving there and ranks him based on his standards.

I'm not sure how long the holiday was and if the trains there on other holidays before. It sounds like he's moving there and making it his home gym so I wonder if the other instructor went off based on that information.

At my old gym we had a student who was paying dues at two gyms. He came to ours for the 6 am class since his home gym didn't have that but didn't want to fully leave his old gym. The owner checked with him and set expectations and there wasnt any promotion issues, despite him being an active member of both gyms.
Eirik Gulbrandsen
Eirik GulbrandsenOP
Black belt 2nd degreeVerified9 forum posts1920/1000
5 year(s) ago
I almost wonder if there was a miscommunication or lack of communication completely. Brown belt thinks that student is staying around or moving there and ranks him based on his standards. I'm not sure how long the holiday was and if the trains there on other holidays before. It sounds like he's moving there and making it his home gym so I wonder if the other instructor went off based on that information. At my old gym we had a student who was paying dues at two gyms. He came to ours for the 6 am class since his home gym didn't have that but didn't want to fully leave his old gym. The owner checked with him and set expectations and there wasnt any promotion issues, despite him being an active member of both gyms.
Yes, the student had not told me he was moving, or that he was training in an other gym. He told me all of that when I asked about the stripes.

But like I said, we made noe big case about it.

This post was to ask if people had experience with similar situations, after all this kind of stuff could be a source for conflicts in the BJJ community.
After all, this grading stuff is pretty much based on unwritten rules.
James Jones
James Jones
Black beltVerified1310 forum posts6475/1000
5 year(s) ago
I really think it's up to the student after they have been training a year or more to let the instructor know that they wish for that instructor to be their promoting instructor in today's age of cross training. No need for any conversation about belts or anything just simply the student letting the instructor know that they wish for them to be the instructor over those decisions. No confusion, no chaos.

Brand new students are another story if they are paying for the full membership and just started training then the Instructor should just assume that they are the promoting instructor. Not everyone only has a full membership to just one academy though. I currently have 2 full memberships and still cross train at 5 to 10 other places once or twice a month. I made it clear to the other academy coach that that the other guy was my "Gi promoting instructor" and I still thought of them as my "coach" even if not promoting me with silly gi belts as the non promoting instructor is more of nogi anyways so it works out fine for me.
Edited 5 year(s) ago
Vince Choo
Vince Choo
Black belt 3rd degreeVerified1126 forum posts21045/1000
5 year(s) ago
One of my students came back from a holiday with 2 new stripes on his white belt, I asked him where he got them, and he told me a friend and brown belt from his home town had given them to him. Not cool. After we'd talked, he offered to take them of, but since he was moving back to his home town in a couple of months I didn't make a big deal about it. This happened about 3 years ago, and it was only 2 stripes on a white belt, but it made me think, has this happened before? What would your reaction be if some random instructor promoted one of your students? Have anyone else experienced something like this?
Agreed that it's not cool to do that. Yes, it's happened to me but I view the practice of awarding grades, where the client wants to train as their choice but once they have been graded elsewhere, they can continue to train with me but I will no longer consider them for future ranks from me out of respect to the other coach. If the client doesn't like it then too bad.
Arthur De Lustrac
Arthur De Lustrac
Purple beltVerified71 forum posts2780/400
5 year(s) ago
Yes, the student had not told me he was moving, or that he was training in an other gym. He told me all of that when I asked about the stripes. But like I said, we made noe big case about it. This post was to ask if people had experience with similar situations, after all this kind of stuff could be a source for conflicts in the BJJ community. After all, this grading stuff is pretty much based on unwritten rules.
We had quite a situation in our gym like that, where it caused some embarrassment.
A guy came and trained with us for two years. He was from a different country and his french and English weren't great so we had had a bunch of misunderstandings with him. However, he trained hard, was talented, and our coach gave him a purple belt.

Shortly after that he goes 6 month in India. He helps a gym over there and some Brazilian black belt comes to visit for a seminar. At the end of the seminar he gives him a brown belt. Then our new brown belt comes back to france and trains again with us. He comes to our coach as if everything was as usual. Our coach, embarrassed, politely congratulates him on the brown belt, and the guy takes the IBJJF paperwork and asks our coach to sign in on it. That was awkward. Our coach said he couldn't, and the guy didn't take it very well.

The truth is, at the time, our coach was going through some stuff, and even if would have wanted to, he couldn't have, but the way he did it made things extra awkward.
Tatu Piispanen
Tatu Piispanen
Black beltVerified1355 forum posts10295/1000
5 year(s) ago
I had a conversation with the student and let them know that I thought they were awesome but since they were a guest and we were not the home gym it wouldn't be right for me to promote them.
This. I think it's mainly on the promoting instructor, especially with beginners. Make sure at least with the student that this is okay regarding their original home gym (if they haven’t transfered fully), and preferably directly with the coach over there too.

We have a few guys who trained quite a bit elsewhere and got promoted. They accepted the belts out of respect for the black belts who gave them, but when returning to our mats, wore the previous ranks (without mentioning the promotion) to later earn the rank from our head coach.
Edited 5 year(s) ago
Deepu
Deepu
Black beltVerified547 forum posts6410/1000
5 year(s) ago
We had a guy that did this twice! He went on holidays back home to Israel, came back with a blue. Meh, we thought no big deal. Next summer, went back again and came back with a purple. We drew the line there and said if he wanted to train with us, he would have to wear his blue. He did, so he wore his blue. Soon after we found out he was doing seminars for money (this was back in the day when there weren't that many black belts around). We asked him to stop representing our school as a blue belt doing seminars. He did not. Had to boot him out.
Christian Graugart
Christian Graugart
Black belt 4th degreeVerified4323 forum posts39315/1000
5 year(s) ago
IMO highly disrespectful to promote someone else's student. There might be many reasons for holding a person at a certain belt, for instance some areas that still need work (which can be hard to know if you don't train with them on a regular basis), a competition coming up, some goals set for results etc. etc. I've had this happen once; a former coach of my student (they haven't trained together in 5-7 years or so) literally sent a purple belt in the mail from across the globe without consulting me. NOT cool. It is the same as saying that I don't know what I'm doing as an instructor since I'm not promoting my own day-to-day student.
Edited 5 year(s) ago
Tillman Keadle
Tillman Keadle
Black belt 1st degreeVerified9 forum posts1725/1000
5 year(s) ago
IMO highly disrespectful to promote someone else's student. There might be many reasons for holding a person at a certain belt, for instance some areas that still need work (which can be hard to know if you don't train with them on a regular basis), a competition coming up, some goals set for results etc. etc. I've had this happen once; a former coach of my student (they haven't trained together in 5-7 years or so) literally sent a purple belt in the mail from across the globe without consulting me. NOT cool. It is the same as saying that I don't know what I'm doing as an instructor since I'm not promoting my own day-to-day student.
Total disrespect from the former coach. Did your student accept it? Or just bring it to your attention?
Paul Elliott
Paul Elliott
Black belt 2nd degreeVerified27 forum posts3780/1000
5 year(s) ago
It happens. There's two scenarios as I see it.

If they are belt/stripe shopping, then I tell them I will not be promoting them unless they explicitly meet my standards. I won't ask them to take off the rank/stripes unless the person promoting them is completely fake.

If they were promoted without understanding they should only have one coach at a time, then I let them know that they need to decide who is promoting them and only accept promotions from their dedicated coach. If they are promoted ahead of where I would rank them, then I let them know that they are not at the level I want them to be at for their rank, and they won't get further promotions until they meet the standards I have for the rank they are wearing.

Really, I could treat this as if the person just walked in the door. If they aren't at the rank they are wearing, then it'll just take longer for me to promote them. If they talk and act as if they are exclusively my student, I'll invest in their long term success and promote them when deserved. If they are a de-facto visitor, then I'll teach them and roll for fun, but I don't feel any particular obligation to invest in their future or ever promote them.
Cosimo Carone
Cosimo Carone
Black belt 2nd degreeVerified546 forum posts24340/1000
5 year(s) ago
One of my students came back from a holiday with 2 new stripes on his white belt, I asked him where he got them, and he told me a friend and brown belt from his home town had given them to him. Not cool. After we'd talked, he offered to take them of, but since he was moving back to his home town in a couple of months I didn't make a big deal about it. This happened about 3 years ago, and it was only 2 stripes on a white belt, but it made me think, has this happened before? What would your reaction be if some random instructor promoted one of your students? Have anyone else experienced something like this?
I absolutely disagree, every student must receive promotion from his teacher.
Bridget Jack Jeffries
Bridget Jack Jeffries
Blue beltVerified621 forum posts3340/200
5 year(s) ago
I don't have any experience with this with BJJ.

When I did TKD in college, I went home one summer and trained at a different gym over the summer. I made sure I checked with my college instructor that it was okay for the summer instructor to promote me to green-advanced at the end of the summer. Seemed like the decent thing to do.
Eirik Gulbrandsen
Eirik GulbrandsenOP
Black belt 2nd degreeVerified9 forum posts1920/1000
5 year(s) ago
IMO highly disrespectful to promote someone else's student. There might be many reasons for holding a person at a certain belt, for instance some areas that still need work (which can be hard to know if you don't train with them on a regular basis), a competition coming up, some goals set for results etc. etc. I've had this happen once; a former coach of my student (they haven't trained together in 5-7 years or so) literally sent a purple belt in the mail from across the globe without consulting me. NOT cool. It is the same as saying that I don't know what I'm doing as an instructor since I'm not promoting my own day-to-day student.
I'm going to ad this to my upcoming book, titled "A hundred ways to make conflicts in the BJJ community"

This one is going to be in the top ten.
Christian Graugart
Christian Graugart
Black belt 4th degreeVerified4323 forum posts39315/1000
5 year(s) ago
I absolutely disagree, every student must receive promotion from his teacher.
But the other way around, the student should also be free to choose who his/her teacher should be :)
Randy
Randy
Black belt 1st degreeVerified267 forum posts3345/1000
5 year(s) ago
At the academy I train at we used to have three instructors. I tended to favor one instructor's method of teaching and technique so I gravitated more toward his classes and ended up getting promoted to purple belt by him after some time. Shortly thereafter, that instructor moved away due to a career change, though he only relocated a couple of hours away. After some time passed my current coach and I had a conversation about the predicament and it was explained to me that I could stay with the coach that had moved away for promotions if I wanted to, but I'd have to drive out to train with him occassionally and that coach would have to make the decision, or I could express my intent to train with my current instructor. Their lineages were different - one being under Royce Gracie and my current coach who is under Geoff Balme/Roberto Maia. Ultimately I decided to show loyalty to the instructor who would be teaching me the most and aligned with my current instructor.

Loyalty is an important virtue and I agree with those that mentioned it speaks to the character of the student how they navigate the terrain. There will always be some gray areas or tight rope walks, but I feel like as long as the student and the teacher communicate and work their way through it in a way that shows respect both ways, you can't go wrong.
Edited 5 year(s) ago
Cosimo Carone
Cosimo Carone
Black belt 2nd degreeVerified546 forum posts24340/1000
5 year(s) ago
But the other way around, the student should also be free to choose who his/her teacher should be :)
Sure! So under no circumstances should he come back to his old teacher with strips assigned by other teachers
Slideyfoot [jun]
Slideyfoot [jun]
Black belt 1st degreeVerified1900 forum posts3635/1000
5 year(s) ago
If one of my students randomly showed up and they'd been promoted by somebody else, I wouldn't be happy (though I think I'd get over it, I don't own them).

f they told me beforehand, then no problem. That's happened before: a guy who had started elsewhere wanted to get his next belt from his old instructor, totally fine with me.
Coachpotato
Coachpotato
Black belt 1st degreeVerified776 forum posts1920/1000
5 year(s) ago
If the student is on the required level... who cares? If they deserve the belt, give them the belt. Doesn't matter who's promoting, as long as they are legit.

A former star student of mine still hasn't been promoted as long as I know. If she ever trains with me again, I'm going to do it.
Rauno Tiukkanen
Rauno Tiukkanen
Black belt 1st degreeVerified59 forum posts3400/1000
5 year(s) ago
While back, when I was a blue belt, I was at working trip in different country and found a school to train. Schedules did not sute for me, so two private classes were only option. I went there and rolled with one intructor of the school, brown belt at that time. After our second private, he kept me a ”budo” speech of our journy in life and bjj and gave me two stripes. I thank him, went to locker room and ripped the off. Never told any one I got ”promoted”. It felt very stupid and kind of embarrasing, like, ”you have a very beautiful wife and I would love to have sex with her”, level.
Christian Graugart
Christian Graugart
Black belt 4th degreeVerified4323 forum posts39315/1000
5 year(s) ago
If the student is on the required level... who cares? If they deserve the belt, give them the belt. Doesn't matter who's promoting, as long as they are legit. A former star student of mine still hasn't been promoted as long as I know. If she ever trains with me again, I'm going to do it.
I disagree; there can be many reasons why their own instructor is not promoting them. Overruling their day-to-day instructor is literally saying that they don't know what they're doing.

Example: I'll hold someone back for a long time if they're on my competition team and I have my eyes on a specific prestigious tournament in the future where I want them to have a decent chance of winning. To train someone for competition is also to maximize their positive experiences with competing. If some other instructor else comes in from the side and promotes them on a holiday "because they deserve the belt" then that would be quite disrespectful towards my professional work with this student.
Christian Graugart
Christian Graugart
Black belt 4th degreeVerified4323 forum posts39315/1000
5 year(s) ago
Example 2: A requirement I might have for my students is that they're proficient and can handle themselves in standup/wrestling before a certain belt level (let's say, purple). They go train somewhere else while traveling, every roll start on their knees and they're killing it. Their wrestling is shit because they don't show up often enough at home / are lazy. Another instructor overrules me and promotes my student. My "name" is still on my student when they travel or compete, and then people think my purple belts can't wrestle. Other instructor waters down my standards = nope.

Of course, if this student choose to have another instructor than me, that is a completely different case. Then I'll leave all future promotions to that instructor and all is good with me :) Just don't come back to me for the next belt.
Coachpotato
Coachpotato
Black belt 1st degreeVerified776 forum posts1920/1000
5 year(s) ago
Obviously there should be no promoting if the student still trains under the original coach. But if that's not the case there should be no issue. Unless they go train under Lasu.
Slideyfoot [jun]
Slideyfoot [jun]
Black belt 1st degreeVerified1900 forum posts3635/1000
5 year(s) ago
Obviously there should be no promoting if the student still trains under the original coach. But if that's not the case there should be no issue. Unless they go train under Lasu.
I think it depends on the person. I can think of several friends of mine who I'd be happy to promote to blue if they ever asked me, as I think their coach is absolutely taking the piss by not promoting them.

One person in particular, they have been a white belt for something like 7 years. This is despite plenty of comp success, solid jiu jitsu game, consistent training, great attitude etc. I've rolled with them lots and have no idea why the hell their coach hasn't promoted them yet.
James Jones
James Jones
Black beltVerified1310 forum posts6475/1000
5 year(s) ago
I think it depends on the person. I can think of several friends of mine who I'd be happy to promote to blue if they ever asked me, as I think their coach is absolutely taking the piss by not promoting them. One person in particular, they have been a white belt for something like 7 years. This is despite plenty of comp success, solid jiu jitsu game, consistent training, great attitude etc. I've rolled with them lots and have no idea why the hell their coach hasn't promoted them yet.
Gotta win those white belt worlds lol

I really don't think people should make that big of a deal out of a blue belt, its just a beginner belt. It's often hard to tell the difference between a white and blue belt anyways.

Purple belt on the other hand I get why instructors really want to have certain criteria and check marks checked first as that is more of a representation of their standards.

Does anyone really judge coaches on the standards of their blue belts? I feel like that is more like saying well we really care about sandbagging at our academy.
While purple and higher it doesn't feel as much like sandbagging and more like just whatever standards and skillsets they want their students to have.
Edited 5 year(s) ago
Bridget Jack Jeffries
Bridget Jack Jeffries
Blue beltVerified621 forum posts3340/200
5 year(s) ago
I think it depends on the person. I can think of several friends of mine who I'd be happy to promote to blue if they ever asked me, as I think their coach is absolutely taking the piss by not promoting them. One person in particular, they have been a white belt for something like 7 years. This is despite plenty of comp success, solid jiu jitsu game, consistent training, great attitude etc. I've rolled with them lots and have no idea why the hell their coach hasn't promoted them yet.
7 years?? I'd find a new coach. I sure hope they're the sand-baggiest white belt around.

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